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Bad Chemistry Jokes &
Along with a couple of charged jokes, find the top 10 ways to get thrown out of a
chemistry lab, proposed new elements for the periodic table and the famous answer to the
question of whether hell is exothermic or endothermic.
ChemCenter Joke-a-Rama Submissions
The American Chemical Society presents the best jokes submitted in its first Joke-a-Rama
contest. Here's your chance to discover the number of atoms in guacamole and why hamburger
has lower energy than steak.
Chemist's Night Before Christmas, A
This takeoff on the Christmas classic substitutes reactions, ringstands and medicinals for
the more familiar holiday trappings, and transforms Santa into a flask-sniffing mad
Chemist's Recipe for
Chocolate Chip Cookies
Metric measurements, chemical names for ingredients and technical descriptions of the
equipment put this recipe beyond the reach of the average baker, but it's good for a few
hoots in the chem lab.
Chuckle over the practical joke possibilities of Professor Eppendorf's novelties -- snake
in a reagent, glow-in-the-dark pipette tips, x-ray specs -- and then move along to the
other jokes, poetry, quotes and puns in this mammoth collection.
Most of these submissions are tricks and nonsensical phrases to help students memorize the
periodic table. One notable example: Please send little Charlie McKie a zebra if the horse
can't munch sweet green plants.
The one thing that's missing from most chemistry labs is music -- chemistry music -- and
this collection of songs provides a solution. Now researchers and students can raise their
voices in rousing choruses of A Mole Is a Unit and the Redox Blues.
Dihydrogen Monoxide Warning
If you've never seen this exceedingly clever spoof that describes -- with deadpan
seriousness -- the destructive potential of one of the world's most ubiquitous substances,
you're in for a treat.
For metrics-haters who just don't get why the rest of the world can't use the American
system of measurement, here's a new interpretation of the conversion scale, showing that
2000 mockingbirds equal 2 kilomockingbirds.
On October 23rd every year, chemists observe a holiday to honor the creator of the mole
concept, Amadeo Avagadro. Pick up some suggestions for your own commemorative by reading
about the festivities at this Huntsville, Ala., school.
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